In the last few weeks, I’ve had the privilege of going through over 80 resumes submitted by people who were looking to gain employment in 2 positions I’m conversant with. One of the positions in question, an administrative assistant, surprisingly got an influx of CVs that came as a surprise to me.

There were two things that bothered me a little after going through the applications. The first was the fact that people are looking for work ọ. WOW!! Maybe I had not been conscious of that fact because I’ve basically run my own company for over 15 years now and not had to apply for any job. An application that even caught me unaware was that of someone with a Masters’ degree willing to take whatever comes his way. In a way, I definitely do not blame him. On another note, I felt sorry for him knowing very well that only 1 person would be chosen among the 80+ applicants.

The second thing that bothered me was the fact that more than 50% of the applicants did not stand a chance of being chosen by the organization if one were to go by the content of their applications and resumes. So many errors laden in a 2-3 pages resume just seemed to pop up the questions about whether or not the applicants actually got the degrees they claimed they got. I mean, how can you be applying for a job and start your application with WHAT’S UP. Or how can you write a sentence that seems to be absent of any type of punctuations. Or how can you get a position in a top organization when your CV shows that you only lasted 2 months or less in the last 5 jobs you’ve been to. Or how can you write READING as your hobby when in the last 1 year you’ve only read 2 books (your Bible and your Pastor’s book on praying and fasting).

The last one got me to the bones. I invited one of the applicants to my office in February to have a discussion. I stressed the fact that it was more of a discussion and not your usual employer-employee interview session. The lady came highly recommended for the position but the resume I read proved otherwise. After talking with the applicant, I discovered that although she seemed very capable for the job, the resume she was presenting was literally shooting her in the leg and would not have given her the opportunity of being employed. I realized that she was more creative, versatile, organized and hardworking than the version of herself on her resume. Is it that people just copy a style of resume and just fill in the blanks with defaults they dubbed from a supposedly reputable source? I mean, how can I ask you about your weaknesses and you tell me you don’t have ANY weakness that God is your strength. Really?

And so I got to the part where the applicant wrote READING as her hobby. I asked how many books she had read in the last 12 months. She seemed not to have seen the question coming. Or maybe I ought to have assumed that reading social media news, and internet gists are all part of reading. Perhaps the fault was mine. I ought not to have insinuated that when someone puts READING as a hobby, it meant they loved to read a lot of books. I was weak.

She was good for the job. She wore good makeup and dressed well. She arrived on time. But her resume lacked good and timely makeup that would have favored her. I gave her an assignment to revamp her resume and resend. Come to think of it, I’m yet to get the revamped CV.

Here’s my point. The post-Covid19/5g age we’re entering will require you doing your very best to ensure that your CV, social media etiquette, writing & communication skills, and emotional intelligence IQ are all way above average. The unemployment rate is going to spike and only the best of the best will get jobs that will pay well for people with problem-solving skills. Gone are the days where companies will only hire you because you’re the son or daughter of Uncle Lagbaja or Aunty Tamedo. The age we’re entering would require that you have a good understanding of the last few books you’ve read if indeed you noted READING as your hobby.

I don’t even know how to end this. Feel free to add whatever conclusion and lessons you can postulate. Bottom line is for us to ensure our resumes, whether online or offline, be a good representation of the positivity, creativity, productivity and professionalism that we bring to the table. Let me rest this heavy briefcase of mine and go have another glass of homemade world-class Zobo.

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